I founded the All-Weather Friend, which is about helping friends get through difficult situations. My first book, Alzheimer’s: A Crash Course for Friends and Relatives, tells how to help people living with dementia. I’ve had hard times in my life—my husband’s brain tumor and suicide, my father’s dementia, infertility, miscarriage, my brother’s sudden death, and other things that flooded me with grief. But my life is filled with joy; I’ve learned that joy comes from God and from a compassionate connection with friends and people we love. I write and speak about “informed compassion.” I hope you’ll visit my website, where there’s a great dementia resource page with contributions by many readers.
I wrote
Dementia and the Church: Memory, Care, and Inclusion
The author, a retired bishop and professor emeritus
at Duke Divinity School, has not only written this book to tell about his
journey as a caregiver to his wife, who died of frontotemporal lobe dementia, but also provides (free of charge) a set of truly excellent companion videos
churches can use to educate their congregations about dementia.
Carder writes
about the transformation in his understanding of love as he learned new ways of
relating to his wife, realizing that she, in her infirmity, had become his
teacher about love.
Dementia diseases represent a crisis of faith for many family members and congregations. Magnifying this crisis is the way people with dementia tend to be objectified by both medical and religious communities. They are recipients of treatment and projects for mission. Ministry is done to and for them rather than with them.
While acknowledging the devastation of dementia diseases, Ken Carder draws on his own experience as a caregiver, hospice chaplain, and pastoral practitioner to portray the gifts as well as the challenges accompanying dementia diseases. He confronts the deep personal and theological questions created by loving people with dementia…
While there are many great memoirs about
Alzheimer’s, this one is unique. It’s almost an adult picture book that quickly
gives a realistic sense of what living with mid-stage Alzheimer’s is like.
Henderson, a former history professor, carried a tape recorder around with him,
documenting his daily thoughts and struggles. Photographer Nancy Andrews made
stunning black-and-white photos to accompany Henderson’s observations.
It takes
little time to read Henderson’s book, but the understanding it conveys is remarkable. It may be hard to find since it is over 20 years old, but it’s
worth the effort.
We all want peace. We all want a life of joy and meaning. We want to feel blissfully comfortable in our own skin, moving through the world with grace and ease. But how many of us are actively taking the steps to create such a life?
Reading this book is like sitting in on a support
group. It’s a collection of quotes about living with dementia from people who
are doing just that.
I love it for churches starting a memory ministry because
these quotes could be quickly read aloud in worship services, as a “ministry
moment,” or read round-robin style in groups beginning to learn about dementia.
I like the collection of many voices speaking out candidly and poignantly about
this difficult journey.
Betsy Peterson spent fourteen years caring for her husband who was suffering from dementia, an experience that put her in touch with others inside the struggle to have or to care for someone with the disease. A combination of contributions from patients, their families, friends, and caregivers, Voices of Alzheimer's gathers the poignant stories, funny quotes, and priceless encouragement that Peterson heard and that helped her along the way. Capturing the many dimensions of the Alzheimer experience-the challenges, the struggles, the humour, and even the rewards-a Voices presents a varied, and realistic, look at what it's like to be affected…
Moments of joy are often all that can be had by
people in the later stages of dementia when life is lived moment by forgotten
moment. What people may not realize, though, is that while the memories of
joyful moments (an ice cream cone, petting a dog, looking at pictures, taking a
walk) may be quickly forgotten, the emotion of joy will linger.
Brackey tells
us how to create moments of joy for our loved ones with dementia and that
people with dementia have much to teach us about ourselves.
The beloved best seller has been revised and expanded for the fifth edition.
Jolene Brackey has a vision: that we will soon look beyond the challenges of Alzheimer's disease to focus more of our energies on creating moments of joy. When people have short-term memory loss, their lives are made up of moments. We are not able to create perfectly wonderful days for people with dementia or Alzheimer's, but we can create perfectly wonderful moments, moments that put a smile on their faces and a twinkle in their eyes. Five minutes later, they will not remember what we did or…
Ava Winston likes her life of routine in Lexington, Kentucky. Then a tornado blows it away. Ava is safe in the basement, but when she emerges, only one corner of her home stands. Rather than crumbling under the loss, she feels a load lifted. Maybe something beyond the familiar is…
Although this book may not seem to fit the list,
it’s one of the best books on loss I have ever read, and I’ve read quite a few. Dementia is about loss, after loss, after loss. Yes, there are moments and
times of joy. And yes, it challenges and expands our love, faith, compassion,
and sense of self. But dementia is, indisputably, about loss.
I read this book
shortly after my husband’s suicide, and it comforted me at a time when comfort
was hard to come by. My Southern Baptist mother also read it and, when she
finished, held it up and said in her practical, down-to-earth way, “This is a
book I will read over and over again like I read the Bible.”
Rabbi Wolpe’s
book is beautifully written and wonderfully wise, and I recommend it to
everyone.
Some losses are so subtle they go unnoticed, some so overwhelming and cruel they seem unbearable. Coping with grief and experiencing loss overwhelms us in ways that seem both hopeless and endless. In painful moments like these, we must make a choice: Will we allow the difficulties we face to become forces of destruction in our lives, or will we find a way to begin learning from loss, transforming our suffering into a source of strength?
A theologian with the heart of a poet, Rabbi David Wolpe explores the meaning of loss, and the way we can use its inevitable…
From Fortress Press: Mary McDaniel Cail calls upon extensive personal and professional experience to offer insight, context, and concrete guidance for congregations and leaders seeking to better serve the growing percentage of the population experiencing life with dementia. Churches have vital roles to play, Cail explains, in helping those living with the difficulties of dementia, by recognizing and supporting the full humanity of all people … A gifted storyteller, Cail crafts her prose with care and intention. Readers will develop “informed compassion,” learning how to accept, pray with, relieve, and comfort all who cope with these increasingly common challenges.
Who was the man who would become Caesar's lieutenant, Brutus' rival, Cleopatra's lover, and Octavian's enemy?
When his stepfather is executed for his involvement in the Catilinarian conspiracy, Mark Antony and his family are disgraced. His adolescence is marked by scandal and mischief, his love affairs are fleeting, and yet,…
When Jennifer Shea married Russel Redmond, they made a decision to spend their honeymoon at sea, sailing in Mexico. The voyage tested their new relationship, not just through rocky waters and unexpected weather, but in all the ways that living on a twenty-six-foot sailboat make one reconsider what's truly important.…
